I was saved when I was 10 at the Bolivar Assembly of God in Ms. Dixie Hitchcock's class. But as I tell you the background leading up to this you might understand. I was 8 years old when I started being sexually molested by a family member. And I felt in my heart that it was all my fault that it was happening. That I was doing something to make this happen to me. Well, one sunday my sunday school teacher started talking about how we are all sinners and we all do things we aren't proud of and that sometimes we do things without meaning to. Well, in my little 10 year old brain I thought that is exactly what I had been doing.
So as our sunday school teacher went on, I knew I had to get saved so all this bad stuff would stop. And I do believe he came in to my heart that day, but I don't think I had the conviction that I should have had, I mainly wanted to save myself from all the pain and hurt and thought this was a quick way out of that. And it actually did stop within 3 months! GOD IS GOOD!
So let's move ahead about 24 years when I was coming back from a women's retreat with 4 van loads of crazy fun women. We had been to a river around Potosi, MO and stayed on a resort. We had had 5 nights of really getting to know one another and getting a more personal relationship with the Lord. We were on our way back and we stopped in Columbia, MO for lunch and to get out of the vans. I was sitting at a table talking with a few of the ladies and this bolt of conviction hit me square in the heart. I found my discipleship leader and drug her out to the van. I told her what had happened when I was little and then told her I never really knew if I was saved, because I felt I did it for the wrong reasons. So I was save on June 14, 1997 for the second time in the McDonald's parking lot. And I knew at the time I prayed those wonderful words and asked him to enter my heart that he was there! I think I cried tears of joy all the way from Columbia to Blue Springs along with all the other ladies in the van.
So I completely understand the issue of confusion regarding our salvations. But I can tell you this, GOD is not confused. He can remember the exact second that we asked him to be our Lord and live in our hearts and lives. He has never been confused. Wish we could be more and more like him!
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Thank you Ronda for opening up. I really am blessed to be a part of this group of awesome women.
You are so brave! And it shows on you. You praise Him instead of being bitter. You could help so many people. God bless you Ronda!
And I do think that sometimes as young kids we see our friends getting saved at a revival, Bible school, etc. and think that we should too so we don't look out of place. I remember feeling out of place many times like that. But, I know that I was saved at home by myself. But, I know now that I'm not some rare freak. I was really feeling like a minority with this. That all of you so very much. That feeling is gone! I really have been thanking God all weekend for you girls!
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